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Posted on a friends Facebook page. Made me laugh.
 "My wife was sitting on the couch under a quilt she'd made when I walked in and decided to sit next to her. Unfortunately, because the quilt was bunched up, I had no idea THE CAT was snoozing underneath it. Before my spouse could stop me, I plopped down and inadvertently sat on the tail of the cranky critter, scaring both ME AND THE CAT!
The furious feline let loose an ear-piercing screech, shot out from under the quilt, and became a fuzzy blur as she streaked through the pet door at a speed she could only attain when fueled by indignant rage.
I, on the other hand, sprang straight up like a helicopter! While in mid-air, I'm sure my heart stopped for several seconds before I landed back on the couch with a thump, gasping for breath.
Slowly, my bride turned, fixed me with an icy stare, and said, "No wonder the kitty doesn't like you."
From then on, whenever my bride had a quilt spread out, I was banned from sitting on the couch.
Yet another freedom was forever lost as my spouse chose the kitty over me.
I hate that stupid cat."

No doubt!

Quote from: wc on February 09, 2025, 10:55:46 AMPosted on a friends Facebook page. Made me laugh.
 "My wife was sitting on the couch under a quilt she'd made when I walked in and decided to sit next to her. Unfortunately, because the quilt was bunched up, I had no idea THE CAT was snoozing underneath it. Before my spouse could stop me, I plopped down and inadvertently sat on the tail of the cranky critter, scaring both ME AND THE CAT!
The furious feline let loose an ear-piercing screech, shot out from under the quilt, and became a fuzzy blur as she streaked through the pet door at a speed she could only attain when fueled by indignant rage.
I, on the other hand, sprang straight up like a helicopter! While in mid-air, I'm sure my heart stopped for several seconds before I landed back on the couch with a thump, gasping for breath.
Slowly, my bride turned, fixed me with an icy stare, and said, "No wonder the kitty doesn't like you."
From then on, whenever my bride had a quilt spread out, I was banned from sitting on the couch.
Yet another freedom was forever lost as my spouse chose the kitty over me.
I hate that stupid cat."

They don't call them "man's best friend's" for no reason. A nice middle aged rescue dog could be a path back to your liberation.